A long hiatus

Wow. More than three years since I posted here. And so much has changed. 
My husband is now in a nursing home and has been for nearly two years and is suffering with the last stages of Alzheimer’s and it is so painful as his wife to watch him suffer so. 
I tried so hard to create a healthy diet for him while he was still at home, though I know that I could have done better. It was just so overwhelming. And now that I am on my own, I am not taking care of me well at all. 
And that’s why I’m here and doing the lame ‘New Year’s resolution’ crap and I figured if I documented it here, I might have a chance in hell of actually sticking to it. 
Caring for my husband has really taken its toll on me. I feel the stress of everything required of me intensely. It makes my chest tight, my breathing fast, heart rate fast. I have gained a lot of weight–both from the antidepressant and antianxiety meds I have to take now as well as from eating the wrong foods. I am exhausted all of the time. My blood pressure is creeping up. While the antidepressant works, it doesn’t take it all away and I have so much trouble functioning. 
I go up and visit him nearly every day and I leave the nursing home in tears almost every day. 
I don’t like living like this. 
And so I am here and hoping that blogging for the next year will be what keeps me sane….and healthy. 
Here’s to 2017.


Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s